Time

(I was going to clean this photo up, but my Dad carried it in his wallet for many years and I wanted to show that)

In September, when I found out that Tammie was sick, time kind of stopped for me and I started to think back through the years. So many memories starting flooding into my mind, as well as a lot of emotion. After the initial shock, I felt a real sense of urgency and hoped and prayed that I would be able to speak with her again. My parents helped me gather up all of the photos that we could find of Tam and we started to talk about all of the good times that she had provided us.

The first trip to Albany to visit her in hospice was excrutiating. Having earned my MLS from the University at Albany, I had made the trip east on the thruway many times. Those times, however, I had made the trip alone. Now, although I had a car full of people, I felt alone again. When we finally made it to Tammie's room, we were not prepared for the shock of seeing her so hopeless. Oh, we had heard from Mike, but somehow your heart doesn't want to believe. Fortunately for us, Tammie was able to understand that we were there and we were able to tell her that we loved her.

Time started again and went very quickly after that initial diagnosis and soon my beautiful, energetic sister was gone. We are still having trouble understanding and we hope that we never forget those wonderful memories of her. The days go by now, but time seems meaningless.